How to Control Emotions During a Difficult Conversation
When you’re in the middle of a conflict, it’s common to automatically enter into a “fight or flight” mentality. But it’s possible to interrupt this response and clear a path towards entering into a more productive discussion. Start by taking a deep breath and focusing on your body. Repeat a mantra to yourself such as “This isn’t about me,” “This will pass,” or “This is about the business.” And try to distance yourself from the negative emotion you’re feeling by labeling it: “He is so wrong about that and it’s making me mad becomes I’m having the thought that my coworker is wrong, and I’m feeling anger.” And don’t forget the value of taking a break. The more time you give yourself to process your emotions, the less intense they are likely to be.
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TasksFocus on Your Body- i.e., placing feet firmly on the ground and noticing what floor feel like
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Try Saying Mantra- i.e., this will pass, or this is about business
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Acknowledge and label your feelings- i.e., tell yourself - he is so wrong about that and making me mad
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Take a Break- i.e. I’m sorry to interrupt you, but I would like to get a quick cup of coffee, can I get you something while I am up!
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